The thing that attracts me most to anyone I meet and make an unconscious opinion of that person in my head, is humility.
After reading, Ego is the Enemy by Ryan Holiday, I have come to observe and got to know the ego inside of me.
You can read a summary of the book I wrote here.
We all have a voice inside of us that tells us, we are the best, the mostest, the smartest, the strongest, the cleverest, the richest, etc.
But the true reality of human beings is that we are all one; we are born, we live then we die.
No one is born richer, smarter, more hierarchical, stronger than any one; at the time of birth we are all babies.
The materialistic influence through the different mediums we come across every day such as TV, shopping malls, corporations, radio, internet, advertising, marketing and so on, boosts the ego inside of us to take control of our decisions and the way we go about our days.
When I lived in London and worked in the financial district of the city, I didn’t see people, I saw delusional egocentric beeings.
The Armani suit, the Bally shoes, The Ermenegildo Zegna Umbrella, the Boss tie, and the Dunhill smell; I saw extreme social status in the air all around me.
And I was, this little poor fella, trying to make £7 an hour delivering food on a bicycle, wearing a £5 cycle pants and a chain oil stained-red-jacket.
But I was enjoying my life like never before, part because I was aware of that ego, and I could see it every where I went to, and the other part was because of the smirk and the look I used to get most of the time from those financial suited men and women.
Many of the companies I have been to, were investment and venture capitals, hedge funds, banks, consulting firms and tech ones such as the likes of Facebook, Google, King and Expedia.
When I got that look of the difference in social class and status at the time I was handing the food, I would smile, genuinely so, as the obviousness of how down the man is looking at me is as clear as a hot sunny summer Saturday; But I would love the feeling; I was smiling at the ego; actually I was smiling at the face of adversity; a skill I learned at my time with The Royal Marines.
Many times I was yelled at, shouted at, looked down upon, cursed, had the door shut in my face so many times, got the phone hung up on me, been called different names other than my real one; and at most times, I would smile and feel rejuvenated with every personal attack.
The more people made me feel worthless and bad, the emotionally stronger I got; I was aware of my physiological state that I was in control of my feelings and reactions; keeping the ego inside of me tamed.
One time, I was kicked out, nicely, from a friends house; after arriving for a week’s holiday, he kicked me out, respectfully, or so he thought, the next night.
How did I react?
As calmly, peacefully, respectfully and mostly understandingly as much as ever.
I said “Sure, I understand you have some problems and you would like to be left alone for a while”
When I went back home, I texted him saying “hope things are going well on your side, let me know if there’s anything you ever need help with, I like helping”
A week later he apologized and invited me back.
Our friendship bonded stronger.
Thanks to keeping the ego beast inside of me under control, I was able to turn things around differently for both of us.
Remember that humility is the strongest self awareness skill,a true wise man can embrace.
If you can show humility in the strongest, most troubling situations, you are one true wise man.
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My name is sherif; I am a dayenjoyer.